Lately I have felt convicted of not showing enough reverence to God and not fully diving into the life Jesus offers to me, (And you, and the disciples and everyone).
I kept thinking about all these cool ways I could tell you about my conviction! Like that’s even possible. It isn’t. So I will spill my guts like I do every week because that is all I know how to do.
There is this imaginary line I feel like I walk on between being “ALL IN FOR JESUS” and just being a regular Joe. This subject gets brought up a lot in Christian conversation, which I’m sure all of you know. I find that super annoying. I also find myself annoying. Mostly because we bring it up and nothing ever changes. I get all amped up in the conversation and the next day I can’t make myself get out of bed five minutes early to talk to the Lord. Mind you, the Lord that created the Heavens and the Earth. The one who breathed life into me and knit me in Kim Wheat’s stomach! The one that provides for me and allows me to speak his name! THAT LORD. FIVE MINUTES!
I can’t help but want to punch myself in the face.
We were talking about this in our small group last week and I put the thought into a metaphor:
It’s like walking up to the edge of the pool that I’m trying to decide if I want to jump into or not. Outside of the pool I’m hot and sweaty and sick of my feet burning on the concrete. But it takes a lot of courage to jump in a pool! And plus, I don’t want to get my hair wet. You’re committed if you jump into a pool. You can’t undo being wet. I think about all the times I’ve jumped in before and I felt so refreshed and rejuvenated. And think about all the things you can do in a pool that you can’t do outside of a pool! You can swim, do flips, float! But swimming isn’t always easy, it takes a lot of work.
The pool is the life that Jesus offers us. Refreshing, rejuvenating, hard work. If you live a life for Jesus, you will do things you could never do before and it’s always worth it. Concrete is normal life. Hot, hard and if you fall on it you get a huge noticeable scar that everyone can see and make fun of you for. A little dramatic…but pretty true.
After going back to this metaphor 3 million times in my head, I noticed that the conversation wasn’t stopping and the conviction was still in my heart. It kept me up last night, pounding my thoughts! Caden, get out of bed, get on your knees and surrender! Sleep can wait, food can wait, Nick can wait! I come up with excuses, which are always all too familiar. I’ll tell myself that I will do it in the morning, tomorrow, next week. I don’t have time. God I’m sorry. Blah Blah Blah Blah.
I NEED TO WAKE UP! THIS IS NOT OKAY!
We can’t keep doing this. We can’t keep telling ourselves that we will talk to God later or follow him later. Later you’ll be dead and then what? And then what? I’m sorry to bring up the dead word but we’ve got to get it together. I don’t want to fall asleep during prayer anymore. I don’t want to have dumb conversations with my friends anymore. I don’t want to spend hours watching TV or checking my phone. How ridiculous is that? I want what Jesus gives. I want to do his will. I want to tell people of him. I don’t want to be scared to jump in the pool! Even just before I wrote this I sat in my closet on a box to be in the Lord’s presence and I couldn’t get myself to sit still or not be afraid that demons were going to confront me (And yes that is an actual thought of mine). What kind of God do I serve? The one that says I should be lazy and afraid? No way, man! God promotes life, boldness, adventure, obedience, love, zeal, hard work! God promises it’s worth it! DO YOU TRUST YOUR CREATOR?
Again this is not an unfamiliar conversation. We talk about this all the time. But the difference between today and yesterday is actually doing what you said you were going to do.
The truth of the matter is there isn’t a lot left to say. I could sit here and type 10 more paragraphs about how sick and tired I am of all this. I could challenge you to be tired of this too and to take action. But really we’ve all got to make the effort to jump in the pool. We’ve all got to passionately and aggressively follow Jesus. Sure, we’ve got jobs and money and family and spouses and school and all other loads of crap we have to deal with that are pretty important but what is all that worth if we aren’t pursing Jesus fully?
Take Shia LeBeouf’s advice and apply it to Jesus, of course…