The past couple weeks I’ve been discouraged by things of this world. That probably sounds really strange to some people, and maybe really true to other people. Either way, I will explain. There is a lot of bad in this world. And sometimes, being the anxious person I am, I let myself fixate on these things. I’ll stay up for hours on end through the night thinking about the world.
Back story: I love the world. I’m in school right now to be a missionary and I want to travel the world and tell people about Jesus more than anything I’ve ever wanted to do in my life. I don’t see how anyone wouldn’t want to do this but I’m very passionate about this so I can’t really see anything else anyway. With this love for the world, though, comes ultimate heartbreak for the world too.
So I’m pretty upset, right? Like these past few weeks there have been moments where I’ve laid face down in my bed thinking “Why doesn’t God just destroy everything?” And not only have I thought about how bad the world is…but I’ve also thought about how bad I am. Yes, I’m going to tell you, publicly, that I mess up. Being at a Christian school doesn’t just make all the bad things go away. There are still weekends where I’m really bored and think “I bet life would be a lot more fun if I was drunk right now.” And that’s the truth! To go off on a little tangent, I would like to tell everyone that just because you are a Christian or a leader in some way does not mean you have to act like you have it all together. I’m so sick of people using their faith as a symbol for never messing up. Wake up, guys! We all suck! But that’s okay because Jesus died for us and HE makes things good and HE restores messed up stuff! SO here’s where we get positivity out of this crapball of the world….
I read Psalms 38 the other day. This passage was suggested by my boyfriend Nick, who God works through in so many way to help me grow in my faith. These verses are a cry out to God. Verse 38:4 says, “My guilt has overwhelmed me like a burden too heavy to bear.” This really spoke to me because it’s how I’ve been feeling all this time. I’ve been crying out to God saying “I can’t take this mess any more, it’s too much. Everything in the world and the sin in me is way too much.” But then we receive hope! You see this chapter of this book is so sad and David’s cry to God is so strong but just when I started to get upset I flipped the page! Psalms 40:2-3 says, “He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; He set my feet on rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in him.”
God lifts us up and puts a new song in our mouths. Yes, things of this world bog us down. But guess what friends, we are not of this world. We are more than conquerors, we are fighters, we are restored, and we are alive. My uncle Charlie wrote a song that I think is absolutely beautiful called There is a Peace. He is very talented and God has gifted him with words that have touched peoples lives through music. These lyrics of the song have always resinated with me… “but I tell you, You’re not of this world, So stand up and fight.” Let’s all let God put a new song in our mouths. We are not of this world.